Am I really ready for this?

As the semester is racing to a close and graduation is creeping closer and closer I've been doing a lot of soul searching. I have to stop and ask myself, "Am I really ready to graduate?" Sure, Westminster has given me opportunities I never would have had before, but I'm still not sure I'm ready to leave and go out into the real world. I feel like everyone around me has such definite plans for their future and I'm just struggling in the wind. There's Chris Norris who had an amazing internship last summer with the Cleveland Indians and has another one lined up for this summer with the Mahoning Valley Scrappers. Clarissa Hunter and TJ Renninger both work for WYTV/WKBN now. And then there's me; no internship and no potential job. I don't even know what I want to do!

Over spring break I did decide that I would stay at home this summer and use that time to do my job searching because there's no way I would be able to do that now. I am involved in too many things on campus plus trying to get everything done for the semester I would drive myself crazy. But maybe that's just my problem. I'm involved in too many things. The more I think about it if I could go back and do this year over I think I would do a lot of things differently.

First of all, I would have had a more definite idea of my capstone project before the year even began. This is the thing that's causing me the most stress because I don't have a lot of things done and the end is coming quickly. I've had such a hard time trying to get in contact with my client that all of this phone-tag nonsense I'm doing now would have been much easier to deal with in September (instead of the end of March with my capstone presentation about a month away).

Secondly, I don't think I would cut down on the number of things I'm involved in on campus because I love them all, but I would definitely have managed my time better. I've realized that I'm the kind of person that gets wrapped up in the moment and forgets about the other things that need to get done that day. It's only recently that I've become so rigid with my schedule because I know that's the only way I'll get things done.

Finally, I would have made better decisions in what classes I'm taking this semester. There is one class in particular that I really regret taking. I feel like the only thing that class has done for me this semester is add to the stress of my schedule. I haven't really learned anything I didn't know before and I really feel like it's a waste of my time to sit through it when I have so many other things to be doing. Who knows, maybe five years from now I'll realize how much I did learn in that class but right now I'm hating every minute of it.

So I have 48 days until I graduate. I've contacted one guy about a job. He said because they are a new company they weren't sure when they were going to expand, but he'd definitely keep me in mind. That's what I'm working with. Maybe in the next 48 days something miraculous will happen and I'll have a solid job lined up...but I'm not counting on it.

Resume Material...finally

I've forgotten the feeling you get when you know you've created something worthwhile. I finally put together a package this week that is truly resume material! It's not anything hard-hitting; it's just a fun little package about sledding. But I love all the nat-sound I was able to catch just from standing at the top of the hill and listening. The interview I got was probably one of my better ones simply because I didn't make it real formal. I just talked to him and casually put the camera up to his face. I like that approach so much better than the formal interview. You can capture more candid shots, people in their natural state of being and that creates more interesting video which in turn will give you a better package.

Stage Directing vs. Screen Directing

Last week, Westminster College put on "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" and I was honored to be the Student Director as well as the Stage Manager for this show. It was an unbelievable amount of work to take on both jobs, but very well worth it! The show was a complete success! As a broadcast major and theatre minor I often find myself comparing the two fields because of their similarities.

With stage directing you are responsible not only for making sure the actual performance runs smoothly but also for all the rehearsals. You are responsible for creating the composition of the actors, making sure the energy levels are appropriate, making sure the actors know all their lines, as well as the overall shape and design of the show. In other words, the success of the show depends a lot on you. While I was only the student director I did have a lot of responsibilities, but I was fortunate to have an amazing mentor in my director, Eileen Hendrickson. It is because of her guidance that I've seriously considered directing as a possible future career.

Directing for a television show may seem entirely different than stage directing, but there are similarities. In a TV show, a director is also responsible for the way a show turns out. You need to be able to communicate well with all the other people you are working with in order to have a successful show. I've only directed once, but I really enjoyed it. There's always pressure, but it's pressure that I thrive on. You are responsible for making sure all the graphics get put up in time, telling the cameras which shots to get and when, and telling the tapes when to run. So in the same sense the success of the show depends on you and your calls.

This year I've come to realize I really enjoy being in charge of things. I don't think I'm as focused on being in front of the camera as I was a year ago. I could picture myself working behind the scenes as well. I live for pressure and deadlines and I think being a director provides some of that pressure.

I'm still not entirely sure what I want to do after graduation, but no one says you have to pick just one thing. All I have to do is get my resume out there and see what comes my way.